Thursday, February 14, 2013

Happy Valentine's Day! Tommy Picks the Best Celebrity Couples!

Happy Valentine's Day, everyone! I hope that your day is filled with merriment and romance. If you're like me, however, it won't be. For those of us who are single, there are two ways to handle this day of PDA: (1) be completely bitter and probably shave off two years of your life by being so depressed, or (2) admire super fun celebrity couples who just get it. Since Tommy Time is all about positivity (lol jk), I'm going with the second choice.

Brad Pitt & Angelina Jolie
Rihanna & Chris Brown
Taylor Swift & [Fill in the blank]

Ha, just kidding. I couldn't resist. Okay, time to get real.

Any couple that brings Fred and Daphne to life
definitely deserves to be on this list.
Sarah Michelle Gellar & Freddie Prinze, Jr.
As we all well know, Hollywood and successful marriages rarely go hand in hand; however, Sarah Michelle Gellar and Freddie Prinze, Jr. have proven that it can be done. The couple met in 1997 while filming I Know What You Did Last Summer and have been inseparable since. They married in 2002, have appeared in four films together, including the Scooby Doo movies, and have two children, Charlotte and Rocky. How fun! I'm still waiting for a Cruel Intentions spin-off in which Kathryn is still turning tricks with her unsuspecting husband (played but none other than her real-life hubby).

Holler for a dollar.
Emma Stone & Andrew Garfield
Mm. Love these two! Ever since playing onscreen lovers in The Amazing Spider-Man, Emma Stone and Andrew Garfield have been the golden couple of young Hollywood. They're both talented, beautiful, and one of them is British! So this shit betta be foreva. Emma and Andrew are nothing but adorable, as they enjoy interrupting each other's E! News interviews and promoting charity while being stalked by the paparazzi (see above).

Surprisingly hard to find a good photo of
these two.
Ellen DeGeneres & Portia de Rossi
Remember when Ellen was a lesbian? Well, she still is! And she's still with her wife, Portia de Rossi. I'm not terribly familiar with Portia's acting resume, but we all know that Ellen is a barrel of fucking laughs and deserves a lifetime of happiness for bringing us daytime TV watchers such joy over the years. They're going on their fifth year of marriage and there's no doubt that their love will continue for many more decades. But not too many; did you know Ellen and Portia are 55 and 40, respectively? Damn. 

Not exactly representative of their love, but
I find the photograph fun to look at.
Blake Lively & Ryan Reynolds
The inclusion of Blake and Ryan on this list is quite precarious, I'll admit. After all, it wasn't that long ago that I was predicting their hush-hush marriage wouldn't last. But that was just wishful thinking on my part. Ryan Reynolds makes my list any day of the week, and Blake, dumb as she is, gets brownie points for being a major player in the Gossip Girl legacy. But they are SO ATTRACTIVE and SO PRIVATE (six months and still no wedding photos?!) that they deserve a long, healthy marriage.

Murica.
The Obamas
I usually avoid political stuff because who wants to read about that shit whilst checking out the latest Cunt of the Week? But I felt the need to be a little patriotic. After all, what list is complete without the President and First Lady repping America up in this bitch? It's so neat that they can be, like, really political and stuff but also be super fun. Somehow I don't think the Romneys would have pulled it off as well.

Reppin' the gays.
Neil Patrick Harris & David Burtka
With Neil Patrick Harris being as omnipresent as he is, it seemed foolish not to include him on this list. The How I Met Your Mother star has been with his partner David Burtka since 2004 and they are the fathers of twins Gideon and Harper. (If I ever met them in person, one of my first questions would be, "Why did you name your kids that?...") Small disagreements aside, Neil and David are definitely one of the best couples out there. If their constant appearances at every award show on earth means anything, it's that they have a long road together ahead of them!

Are they or aren't they?
Bonus: Leighton Meester & Adam Brody
This shit is hot off the presses, y'all! Earlier this month, the media went cray with reports that Leighton Meester and Adam Brody, who starred together in The Oranges, have been dating "for weeks." I'm a fan of both actors and this makes SO MUCH SENSE for them to be hook up that I'm almost kicking myself for not thinking of it earlier! Not much is known about their relationship, or if the reports are even true to begin with, but let's all suspend our disbelief for the sake of Saint Valentine or whoever the fuck this holiday is named for and pray that Leighton and Adam are indeed an item!

This list may be a little biased, and there are certainly other celebrity couples who are just as deserving of a spot on this prestigious compilation as the rest of 'em, but that's not important. What we should all take away from this is that if you're single this Valentine's Day, it's okay! Live vicariously through the beautiful love stories I have just told you. And if you're in a relationship, check yourself, okay? Because whatever you have will NEVER measure up to these seven couples.

4 comments:

Taylor Tanton said...

Neil and David are too cute! I want to have their children and I don't even like kids that much! I love how you made sure to represent the gay and lesbian community

MKlass said...

So multicultural up in here.

Madeleine Wills said...

love this list! simply too much fun. Happy Valentine's Day! <3

Deanna B said...

Nice touch, patriotically of course.