Monday, June 30, 2014

Jam of the Week: "Your Love" by Nicole Scherzinger

Nicole Scherzinger is back! After much delay, the former Pussycat Doll has officially released the lead single from her upcoming second album. If her first album was any indication, it will pretty much be a strictly European thing, meaning you probably won't ever hear "My Love" except for her.

While there's really no such thing as a Nicole Scherzinger style, this song is the perfect fit for her. It's fun and catchy as hell, even if it makes little sense.

Friday, June 27, 2014

Bitch of the Week: Stubbs the Cat

Pretty kitty

Did you know that the mayor of Talkeetna, Alaska is a cat? Well, it's true! The small town, which is technically considered a historical district and therefore does not have an actual mayor, elected Stubbs the cat as its mayor in July 1997 and he has been going strong ever since. As such, he's also the Bitch of the Week

Lauri Stec, a general store manager, found Stubbs and the rest of his litter in a box in the parking lot. She chose Stubbs because he had no tail. Eventually, he became so popular that people just accepted he was the mayor. I'm not kidding. It just happened. The town, which prides itself on its eccentricity, were just like, "Yeah, he's our mayor!"

Stubbs operates out of his office in the general store. (Also not kidding.) He attracts 30 to 40 tourists a day. Every afternoon, he frequents a local restaurant and drinks water out of a wineglass laden with catnip.

It hasn't been all games for Stubbs. He's often harassed by teenagers, which is fucking rude #leaveStubbsalone! In August 2013, he was attacked by a dog and suffered a punctured lung, a fractured sternum, and a deep wound in his side. A crowdsourcing page was set up to pay for his medical bills.

When will your cat?

Thursday, June 26, 2014

Tori Spelling and Jennie Garth's New Sitcom is Embarrassing; But Yay for a 90210 Reunion

We're not in Beverly Hills anymore.

ABC Family has never had much luck with comedies; aside from rarities like Melissa & Joey, most of them fail to garner a loyal audience and see cancellation within their first few episodes. That's why it's so bizarre that they keep trying the same shit, hoping that this time it will stick.

Well, in the case of Mystery Girls, it most certainly does not stick. The show focuses on Holly (Tori Spelling) and Charlie (Jennie Garth), two washed-up TV actresses who starred as detectives on the small screen 14 years ago. Sound familiar? You would only need one hand to count the noteworthy projects Tori and Jennie have taken on since their heydays on Beverly Hills, 90210 (1990-2000). Mystery Girls knows this, and everyone, including its two stars, is in on the joke.

They also seem to understand how ridiculous the plot is. You see, while Charlie has retired from the spotlight and settled into family life in suburbia, Holly does just about anything she can to stay relevant. The two reunite, however, when a murder witness refuses to give his statement to anyone except the actress' TV counterparts. And then the girls decide to go into the detective business for real, hiring the murder witness, the overly flamboyant Nick (Miguel Pinzon), as their assistant.

The fact that the show understands its own stupidity is one of its only redeeming qualities. Tori and Jennie aren't exactly comediennes, and while Jennie's four-year stint on What I Like About You gives her a bit of an upper leg, it's clear that they're not meant for slapstick comedy in front of a "live" audience. Instead, they take turns screaming their lines, begging for laughter. And don't get my started on Nick, who is stereotyped within an inch of his life (even screeching over Lady Gaga tickets), that you were watching something made 10 years ago.

At this point, it's worth noting that tonight's premiere episode was not the pilot. So all that plot information I just gave you? Forget about it. Instead, we were treated to episode 3, and we're expected to know what the hell is going on. Not that it's all that complicated. Tabloid rumors of Holly's death lead to the revelation of a sex tape, and the girls let the public continue thinking she's dead until they can locate the tape, which they do after a series of ridiculous hijinks.

The fact that ABC Family chose not to air the pilot, probably because it's not good, is not nearly as concerning as the fact that this episode is what they considered the strongest contender out of the gate.

All that said... I laughed quite a bit at the show. Not at the jokes themselves, but how ridiculous the entire show is. And there's something endearing about seeing lifelong friends Tori and Jennie onscreen together again. An official 90210 reunion seems to be out of the question, but I'll take this for now! And even though I sense cancellation in just a few short weeks, I look forward to seeing how many more "mysteries" and Shannen Doherty jokes these ladies have in them.

Wednesday, June 25, 2014

Cunt of the Week: Phil Robertson

The Face of America

A few months ago, I traveled out of the country and was disgusted to learn that some one of the most popular American programs on their televisions was Duck Dynasty. How fucking gross is it that a bunch of camouflaged, backward hicks are the ones reppin' America in other countries.

All of this would be forgivable if it wasn't for Phil Robertson. Never mind the fact that he is a professional hunter, which is disgusting in and of itself, but he has a nasty habit of being a cunt in the public eye. Lest we forget, late last year when Phil gave an interview in GQ. When asked what he considered sinful, Phil replied: "Start with homosexual behavior and just morph out from there. Bestiality, sleeping around with this woman and that woman and that woman and those men."

Okay, fine. He's homophobic and slut shaming. Whatever. He's not the first person to do so and he won't be the the last. (And honestly, what do people expect from this family? A pride parade?) But after facing public backlash, he took the comments a step further. "Jesus will take sins away," he said. "If you're a homosexual, he'll take it away. If you're an adulterer, if you're a liar, what's the difference?"

There are definitely a few differences, but we won't get into it. A&E condemned Phil's comments and suspended him from the show, a decision I never fully agreed with. Nine days later, they lifted the ban, a decision I definitely didn't agree with. (Honorable mention for Cunt of the Week: A&E for having no backbone or conviction; who cares what your decision is, just stick with it!)

And then he did it again:
You say, 'why’d they get mad at you?’ Cuz instead of acknowledging their sin, like you had better do, they railed against me for giving them the truth about their sins. Don’t deceive yourselves. 'Is homosexual behavior a sin?' the guy asked me. I said, 'do you not know that the wicked will not inherit the kingdom of God? Don’t be deceived. Neither the sexually immoral, nor the idolators, nor adulterers nor male prostitutes, nor homosexual offenders, nor thieves, nor greedy, nor drunkards, nor slanderers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God!
And again:
I'm actually a nice man. I'm trying to help those poor souls and turn them to Jesus.
And again:
Whatever you do, whatever you do, go register to vote, especially on this next presidential election! Register to vote, and you ought register for the House and the Senate too! Get your tail down there and vote this ungodly bunch out of Washington, D.C.
And then there's nice commentary on the civil rights movement:
I never, with my eyes, saw the mistreatment of any black person. Not once. Where we lived was all farmers. The blacks worked for the farmers. I hoed cotton with them. I’m with the blacks, because we’re white trash. We’re going across the field … They’re singing and happy. I never heard one of them, one black person, say, ‘I tell you what: These doggone white people’—not a word!… Pre-entitlement, pre-welfare, you say: Were they happy? They were godly; they were happy; no one was singing the blues.
 This is your man, America!

You said it, not me.

Tuesday, June 24, 2014

This or That: Paris Hilton vs. Kim Kardashian

Gettin' #turnt

Onetime friends and lifelong frenemies Paris Hilton and Kim Kardashian have a lot of things in common. For one, they're both famous for being famous celebrated for just being themselves! Ever since Kim's family became reality royalty, she and Princess Paris have been constantly compared to one another. I've already touched upon their friendship while discussing the Cult of the Frenemy, but now it's time to decide just who's the better socialite.

Childhood (aka $$$)

Paris had a bitchin childhood, being carted around to various Hilton suites and boarding schools on both coasts. She was rolling in the dough and grew up with a bunch of friends who would eventually become famous as well. (Nicole Richie says hi!) Kim had a more traditional upbringing, and while she was not exactly slumming it in Calabasas, she wasn't as massively wealthy (we've all seen the house that family lived in at the beginning of the show!) as Paris and had few to no famous friends. This round goes to Paris!

Famous For...

I know what you're gonna say here. Both of these ladies are famous for their respective sex tapes. But did you know they had names for themselves before that?

Paris began modeling at charity events at age 19 before she was eventually signed to Donald Trump's modeling agency, because who knew that was a thing? She started appearing on fashion magazine covers, and soon after in gossip columns for her hard partying ways. Of course, it really was The Simple Life, her reality show co-starring Nicole Richie, that put her on the map. And why was the show so successful? Her sex tape, 1 Night in Paris, which was "never intended for release," just so happened to have leaked right before the show premiered.

While Kim's father made a name for himself (more on that later), she got most of her media exposure through her friendship with Paris. She was a personal shopper and stylist for several A-list stars, but it was Paris who decided to trot Kim out onto the red carpet. That was probably her biggest mistake, because when Kim's sex tape leaked in early 2007, everyone forgot she was Paris' friend. E! quickly offered her a reality show and the rest is history. Because Kim got to where she was by riding on Paris' coattails and having an "anything you can do, I can do better" attitude, this round goes to Kim!

Strength in Numbers

It's always best to have an army behind you when you're in the spotlight. We've already discussed how Paris had more famous friends than Kim, but what about their family? Paris has Nicky, but as we mentioned oh so long ago, she's the other sister, and that's never good enough. She also has two nameless brothers who don't get her anywhere. And I guess you can count her two "actress" aunts (aka washed-up Real Housewives stars), but I don't.

Kim, on the other hand, has a laundry list of famous kin. Her father is Robert Kardashian, OJ Simpson's lawyer (we'll just leave that one alone), and her stepfather is Olympian Bruce Jenner. Through their reality show, mother Kris, brother Rob, and sisters Kourtney and Khloé also became famous. Not to mention, Kim's stepbrother is The Hills star Brody Jenner. Clearly, Kim wins this round!

Reality Queens

Who has the better reality show? The Simple Life is obviously iconic, as it showcased Paris and Nicole trying to live like normal Americans, usually to unsuccessful but hilarious results. Keeping Up With the Kardashians is more of a ~*documentary*~ series that shows the daily lives of the fam. It's both funny and, at times, dramatic. Both shows are great, but the Kardashians get props for not making it so obvious that the show is scripted, as well as for their countless spin-offs. Paris has had a few reality shows after The Simple Life, but nobody remembers what they are. Take it home, Kim!

Other Ventures

Between clothing lines, perfumes, and attempted acting gigs, Paris and Kim kind of cancel each other out here. But what about music? Kim's "Jam" was the very first Jam of the Week on Tommy Time. But Paris managed to record an entire album that actually received mixed reviews (versus the universal pan that Kim's single received). This round goes to Paris!

Personal Lives

Being a professional socialite basically means that you're only as interesting as your personal life. Paris Hilton's dating life is full of a bunch of nobodies (literally don't know their names) and B-listers (Nick Carter). I've never agreed with Kim K's dating choices (Nick Cannon... Seriously?), and she did have that whole 72-day marriage thing, but she's happily married with a baby without the substance abuse rumors and arrests Paris has accumulated. As if I had to say it, this round goes to Kim!

So, it's clear Kim is the better socialite. And Paris can't even be mad, because she invented the game, and Kim just played it better. You go, girl!

Friends till the end.

Monday, June 23, 2014

Jam of the Week: "Expertease" by Jennifer Lopez

If you've given up on JLo because of one too many Pitbull collaborations, it's time to get the fuck over it, because bitch is back and truly better than ever. Returning to her urban roots after a questionable dip in the dance genre, Jennifer Lopez's new album AKA is full of jams, the most JoW-worthy of which is "Expertease".

Obviously, it's a masterful play on words, so it's already super fun. But it has an insanely catchy hook ("Let me show my expertise, I'm an expert tease, and you know it.") Not only that, but the chorus is preceded by a pre-chorus that's amazing. So you're jamming, thinking you're at the chorus, and then it hollers into the actual chorus and you're just over the moon.

Slay a little harder, JLo!

Friday, June 20, 2014

Bitch of the Week: Iggy Azalea

"I kill pride, I hurt feelings."

She been up all night, tryna get that rich, she been work-work-work-work-working on her shit. And it got her here, as Bitch of the Week! Ladies and gentlemen, I give you that I-G-G-Y, Miss Iggy Azalea.

If you've been living under a rock for the past six months and "Fancy" isn't your jam, let me tell you a lil something about Iggy Azalea. She's a musical genius; if Nicki Minaj and Kesha had a kid, it would be Iggy. She's been slaying us with jams for months now, but it turns out she's been bitching it up since day one.

Iggy was born in Australia, which explains why she's so hot. She's so scrumptious, in fact, that she infamously had to stop crowd surfing because errybody was trying to finger her!

As a teenager, she scrubbed floors. But Iggy knew she was destined for something far greater and hollered right on over to the US of A at age 16. She told her parents she was going on vacation (or, on "holiday," in her words) but just never came back. #aight

She made the rounds in the Miami rap scene and eventually got viral exposure for her song "Pu$$y", which is iconic and includes a tasteful vaginal Skittles analogy. Then, T.I. stepped in and made Iggy his protege.

Iggy continued slaying these hoes (trigga on the gun like), which unfortunately meant dealing with the occasional hate. Looking at you, Azealia Banks!

But Iggy is the one laughing at the end. "Fancy" is currently the #1 song in the country, and her debut album topped the rap charts, making her the first white person with a vagina to do so. Not only that, but she dresses as last Bitch of the Week Cher Horowitz in her music video for "Fancy". So, yeah.

Wednesday, June 18, 2014

Cunt of the Week: Farrah Abraham

Mom of the Year!

The reigning Cunt of the Week is none other than Farrah Abraham. If you're not familiar with her, you're at least familiar, or have heard of, the world she comes from. Farrah rose to prominence as a "star" of the reality TV series 16 and Pregnant and its subsequent spin-off Teen Mom.

At first, she was one of the more normal girls on the show. She seemed sweet, and her pregnancy seemed like an honest mistake; and not only did her abusive mother deny her an abortion, but her boyfriend and the father of her child died in a car accident eight months into her pregnancy. She even tried to do the right thing and go to culinary school. You couldn't help but feel sorry for her.

Then it all fell apart when her reality as a teen mom was overshadowed by her reality as, well, a reality star.

In August 2012, she released a memoir and a debut album, both titled My Teenage Dream Ended. What else ended? Teen Mom that same year. Girlfriend was in serious need of a new gig. That came in the form of a sex tape the following year.

Farrah tried to claim the tape was for personal use. The problem? Her partner on the tape was well-known porn star James Deen, who claimed that Farrah hired him to do the tape and even tried to convince him to pretend to date her. Farrah slammed James and called him a liar, but eventually admitted to having purposely leaked the tape. She said it was "[celebrating] your awesome body [and getting] your own sexy shots."


Two separate tapes were released by Vivid Entertainment. Farrah then went and made a career out of appearing at porn conventions and strip clubs, but later claimed that the sex tape ruined her life.

Um, yeah, and probably your daughter's!

Since then, she's gotten back into music, which is just a hobby, guys. She swears it's not a career move! She's also writing a trilogy of erotic novels because, why not? If her entire career thus far has proved anything, it's that she likes anything having to do with sex, no matter the consequences.

That's how she became the most-searched reality star of 2013. And any time you take out a Kardashian like that, you best believe you're ending up on the Cunt of the Week list.

Still need convincing? Here are some quotes from the teen mom:
  • On waxing her toddler daughter's eyebrows while she's sleeping: "I actually get a lot of fan mail from girls who were younger who did have unibrows and they only wished that their moms would have helped them out."
  • "This is a weird position. It's like how I gave birth to my daughter."
  • When confronted with the word elaborate: "A library?"
  • On being a feminist (I kid you not, this was her response to being asked if she was a feminist): "I’m pretty feminine. I think so…What does that mean, you’re a lesbian or something?" 
  • On her DUI: "I was drinking throughout the night but I was just getting drinks from friends and I was not really trying to drink."
  • Also on her DUI: "I did not endanger anyone's life."
  • On sex tape co-star James Deen: "I don't need to talk negatively about someone because I have nothing good to say. He should really just get out of the porn industry because things have gotten to his head, he disrespects women, and his penis is small. I haven't seen many but his definitely was not big."
  • On being a single mother but also a businesswoman: "I'm probably one of the best parents you're ever gonna meet. So I learn how to balance this. I feel like if I can't show my true self, and if I can't explore who I am, then it would be lying to myself and I would stunt my growth. So if I feel like opening up a restaurant, opening up a gentlemen's club, opening up a children's clothing store, and doing songs, books, everything that I feel like doing, I'm going to do it. It suits me well. That's who I am."
Also, if you're worried about Farrah's financials, feel free to buy her something from her Amazon wish list. She's asking all her fans to do so!

Monday, June 16, 2014

Jam of the Week: "Maps" by Maroon 5

While it always goes without saying that whenever Maroon 5 is discussed, there is an obligatory but unspoken moment of grieving for the band that once was, it's important we try to appreciate their continued efforts to bring us new jams. "Maps" is an epic feat in that department.

"Maps", the lead single off their upcoming fifth album, is in the same vain as "Moves Like Jagger" and "One More Night" or anything off of Overexposed. It's poppy and made for the treadmill and dance floor. And that shouldn't come as a surprise. OneRepublic Ryan Tedder (who has written basically every smash song for artists like Beyoncé, Demi Lovato, and Kelly Clarkson) and Max Martin (a hit-maker for Britney Spears and Katy Perry) are both credited as songwriters.

The song explores the theme of searching for love, as Adam Levine sings, "All the roads you took came back to me / So I'm following the map that leads to you."

Monday, June 9, 2014

Jam of the Week: "Ugly Heart" by G.R.L.

This week's jam is brought to you by G.R.L. You might be asking yourself, Who the fuck is G.R.L.? Well, it's a girl group initially formed as the new incarnation of the Pussycat Dolls, but for one reason or another, they took on a different name. Then, they released a lame ass song called "Vacation" for The Smurfs 2, which was offered as a free download if you bought the masterful jam "Ooh La La" by Britney Spears.

Everything so far makes these girls sound like a bunch of basic bitches, right? Well, luckily they turned things around. They're featured on Pitbull's hit "Wild Wild Love" and have officially released their debut single, "Ugly Heart". It's a far cry from the urban dance music they would have been making if they were Pussycat Dolls.

Sunday, June 8, 2014

Lana Del Rey Might Be Dissing Lorde in a New Track

So legit.

The release of Lana's new album Ultraviolence is right around the corner; as such, we're learning a lot more about the songs that will be on the record. I was personally looking most forward to "Fucked My Way to the Top", because its iconic title is enough to assume that it would be a fantastic jam.

Well, as it just so happens, Lana recently opened up about the song's meaning. It's about a basic bitch, and that basic bitch just might be none other than former Cunt of the Week Lorde:
It’s about a singer who first sneered about my allegedly un-authentic style, but later stole and copied it, and now she’s acting like I am the art project and she’s the true super artist. My God, and people actually believe her. She’s successful! I shouldn’t continue ranting – it doesn’t get anywhere.
No, rant more! We love it.

For those of you who don't know, Lorde dismissed Lana as being superficial and unrelatable because she sings about opulent lifestyles. Well, here's the thing, sweetie. Singing about not having an opulent lifestyle is just as shallow. And what's worse, Lorde's style is very distinctly Lana-inspired. So it doesn't take a genius to connect the dots.

This is the second time Lana has proven herself a warrior leading the fight against cunts; a song in which she disses Lady Gaga leaked onto the internet last summer.

Slay 'em basic bitches, Lana!

Saturday, June 7, 2014

Things Tommy Loves and Hates #16

Pop 'em out!

Thing I Love #16: Kourtney Kardashian's Pregnancies

There is tons of speculation that Kourtney Kardashian is pregnant with her third child, and she hasn't exactly denied it! Not only does it mean that we'll soon have more Kardashians to keep up with (#bless!), but we will see Krazy Kourt again. You see, Kourtney's hippie lifestyle and heartless monotony soar during her second and third trimesters, and it's a lot of fun to watch. Hopefully it'll all end with her pulling her own child out of the womb again. Why mess with success?

Additional kudos to Kourtney for always scheduling a pregnancy just in time for a new season of the show! She confirmed she was expecting Mason in 2009 right before the premiere Kourtney and Khloe Take Miami. She confirmed her second pregnancy in 2011, at just 9 weeks in, reportedly in an attempt to distract the media from Kim's infamous 72-marriage; a new season of the Kardashians was just around the corner.

And now, just a few days before the show returns to E!, Kourtney is reportedly expecting. Slay harder, K!

Thing I Hate #16: Politically and Socially Motivated Diatribes on Social Media

Particularly Facebook. Obviously, this is just a personal preference, as people are free to say whatever they want. (Thanks, Constitution!) But CAN YOU NOT. Every time there is an a current eventNay, an article about a current event—people think they have all the fucking answers and embark on long ass speeches like they're running for office. I should never have to click "See More," people!

And then everyone takes it as an invitation to comment on the post and spark a debate! No. NOOO. Your poorly researched and extremely one-sided views have their time and place (like, let's say, a blog). Facebook is not the time, nor the place! Thanks.

Wednesday, June 4, 2014

Woman Crush Wednesday: Dianna Agron

"Every day is an opportunity to fall or hurt yourself."

"I feel as if I go to Africa, I may never come back. I'm just going to live
with the animals and adopt an elephant, and it is going to be my friend."

"Look, we are human. We make mistakes. I will gladly shout from the
rooftops that I am not perfect. Nor will I ever be."

Tuesday, June 3, 2014

20 Things You Didn't Know About Wonder Woman

  1. The man who created Wonder Woman, William Moulton Marston, also created the systolic blood pressure test, the precursor to the modern polygraph. However, it was his wife, Elizabeth, who suggested that the hero, who would triumph not with fist or firepower but love, should be a woman.
  2. Elizabeth served as the inspiration for the character alongside Olive Byrne, who lived with the couple in a polygamous relationship.
  3. Early drafts of Wonder Woman's debut in All Star Comics in 1941 used the name Suprema for the character. Thankfully, it was dropped before going to print.
  4. Initially, the character is an Amazon champion who wins the privilege of leaving Paradise Island and escorting WWII Captain Steve Trevor, whose plane crashed on the island, back to the United States. Later incarnations have Wonder Woman as a clay sculpture brought to life by the Greek God. Both of these origin stories are still used commonly, although the 2011 revamp makes the character a demigoddess and natural-born daughter of Zeus. #SupHercules
  5. Her alter ego is Diana Prince. In the comics, she pays to send a nurse to South American in return for her identity. That's some sketchy shit, WW.
  6. In the 1940s, Wonder Woman briefly fought along side the Justice League Society of America. So impressed with her skills, the JSA offered her to hop aboard full time... As their secretary.
  7. Because of her origin story, Wonder Woman is often pitted against Nazis, but her archenemy is Cheetah.
  8. From the late 60s to early 70s, Wonder Woman gave up her powers in the comics so she could remain in "Man's World" while the other Amazonian women traveled to a different dimension. During this time, she ran a mod boutique.
  9. Wonder Woman's defining characteristic is her non-discriminatory love. Much like Superman, she kills only when left with no other alternative.
  10. Originally, the character's back was fully exposed. However, in response to criticism regarding the amount of violence and nudity in comics, the Comics Code Authority was established in 1954, and Wonder Woman's back was covered up.
  11. Wonder Woman's first appearance on television was on a 1972 episode of the animated series The Brady Kids.
  12. After the success of Batman, there were several failed attempts throughout the 1960s and 70s to create a live-action TV series focusing on the character. Finally, a one-hour special starring Lynda Carter as the superheroine aired on ABC in 1975. A ratings success, two more specials aired the following year, which led to a full pick-up.
  13. Lynda Carter was the one that suggested Diana Prince spin to transform herself into Wonder Woman's costume. 
  14. After one season on ABC, the show moved to CBS, and its 1940s setting was changed to the 1970s. Lyle Waggoner, who played Steve Trevor in the first season, played the character's son in the following seasons. Don't worry, he's the love interest both times...
  15. This Wonder Woman show was never truly canceled. CBS let their option expire without making any decision.
  16. In 2011, NBC attempted to make another live-action series based on the character. A pilot was filmed but the network ultimately opted not to pick it up. Shortly after, a "Wonder Woman origins story" series stalled at the CW.
  17. The French organization AIDES used the character in an awareness campaign for AIDS. The ad shows a disease-stricken Wonder Woman dying in a hospital bed. Concerned the campaign would affect sales, DC Comics ordered AIDES to withdraw it.
  18. A Wonder Woman film has been in development for over 20 years. The character will make her live-action theatrical debut in 2015's Batman V Superman: Dawn of Justice, portrayed by Gal Gadot, who is also signed to play the character in a solo film and a Justice League film.
  19. The character made her big screen debut in 2014 in The Lego Movie...
  20. Like all great superheroes, there's a Wonder family, including Wonder Girl, Wonder Boy, and Wonder Man.

Man Crush Monday: Zayn Malik

"I like the term 'misunderstood.' But I'm a bit of a bad boy."

"I'm not one to get involved with what anybody says about me."

"No matter how many times people try to criticize you, the best revenge is
to prove them wrong."

Monday, June 2, 2014

Jam of the Week: "Sirens" by Cher Lloyd

Chery Lloyd is back, bitches!

For those of you who don't know who Cher Lloyd is, flop a little harder. Then join the rest of the pop-literate world and understand that she was a runner up on the British version of The X Factor. (PS being a runner up is waaaay better than winning; case in point: One Direction.)

She made a splash two summers ago with "Want U Back", which you may remember as the song in which she grunts after every line. Well, she's used the time since that song's release to mature and cultivate a refreshingly more adult, but still super fun sound.

Enter "Sirens", a lovely ballad about a taxing love. It's rumored to be about her father. Kind of a downer, but beautiful nonetheless!